Desperate for God
It is interesting to me how the seasons and cycles of life affect us spiritually, especially our sense of dependence upon God. As a younger man contemplating God’s call to become more involved in ministry, I carried with me a deep sense of inadequacy regarding my own ability to meet the depth and variety of needs represented by the people I knew. When involved in ministry I prayed, studied God’s Word and looked for Him to act in situations where humanly speaking there was no hope. I didn’t know it at the time but it was a great place to be.
Then it was off to Bible school and seminary where I received extensive training in studying the Scriptures and developing skills for ministry, such as preaching, teaching, counseling and conducting weddings, funerals and baptisms. Six years, and 2 degrees later, I still had a sense that if God didn’t move nothing of spiritual significance would happen. But I also knew that I had been called, trained and equipped in the ways and purposes of God. I now had some ability and the temptation was to trust in those abilities to study, craft a sermon, win souls, disciple people and administrate the affairs of the church. I was no longer as desperate as I once had been.
In my first call it was time to be released and watch God change many lives in the congregation I had been called to serve. Six months later, after giving the congregation all that I had to give, I sat before the church council, desperate and broken, and asked them to re-affirm my call as their pastor. There had been no significant change or growth, only criticism, conflict and overwhelming human needs left unfulfilled. Once again, I didn’t know it but it was a great place to be.
Our sense of desperation, or dependence upon God, is a really a great gift because it strips us of our self-sufficiency and makes us aware of our dependence upon God’s grace in new ways. It also brings clarity about our ministry responsibilities, and allows God to do what only He can do. However, our desperation must not be allowed to turn to discouragement, which is what desperation becomes without God in the equation.
Are you desperate for God’s presence and empowerment for living? Do you live with a sense that if anything of significance is going to happen through you spiritually that you must be abiding in Jesus daily? Being desperate for God is a great gift, it will bless you and the people you serve.
Author
Pastor Bruce is the Executive Director of God's Living Stones. He lives in Omaha, NE, with his wife Barb. They have two adult children.
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